The fact that it’s been a month since I’ve last spoken to you should tell you all of these things:
- I (feel like I) don’t have any free hours in the span of a day. Life happens, and it happens 17 thousand times faster at school. For some odd reason, at the start of each year I bring a shelf full of books to read during my leisure time… “leisure time.” My dreams about taking a few minutes to read a novel for fun never truly come to fruition. I guess that was a roundabout way of saying that this past month has been a nutzo, stressball, all-I-wanna-do-is-not-have-anything-to-do type of time.
- I have not been calm enough to reflect on what’s happening in life for the past 30 days. Plain and simple. Each day has been an effort to get through the day in hopes that by the end I can still function, and get enough sleep to wake up early for the next morning’s endeavors. Craziness mostly has to do with dance, and the Virginia Rep Company that I am a part of here at school.
- My free time…that quote unquote leisure time that I do get every now and then has been devoted to either A) TLC for my mind aka an episode of Mad Men and laying in bed for 45 minutes, or B) spending time with people I care about. Mostly B.
Here I am confessing the tales of college life. Where did I get today’s free time to blog you may ask? Well, plain and simple, if I didn’t write today, I was gonna go bonkers. So here I am. Here we are.
Do you ever think about coincidence? Who am I kidding, we all do… but I’m talking about those moments that pop out at you like a building-side billboard off Hollywood Boulevard.
I spent the last few days thinking about the School of Theater and Dance (dance concentration) graduates, class of 2014. This unique group of individuals changed my life. They have shaped who I am as a student, as a dancer, as a person, and continue to enrich and enlighten my days and my work. While here, they were my older sisters, my mentors, my role models. Now, they’re my inspiration. Who I aspire to emulate and harness as a senior in the dance program. So I’m thinking about them a TON this week… an unsual amount. I’m home from rehearsal, laying in bed. I see a Facebook message from a familiar dancer-writer who I’ve mentioned in this blog before (probably multiple times). Anyway. It was a prayer. It was words of encouragement and peace. It was just what I needed, and you know what? It wasn’t coincidence. It was a God moment. It was a message from the woman herself, Caro.
I wanted you to know that I’ve been thinking about you recently quite a bit. Mostly I’ve been praying for Virginia Rep this year. I pray that you are able to love this opportunity and be a light to one another in and through and because and in spite of all the darkness, brokenness, and uncertainty that inevitably brews when you share an intimate experience like this one with a group of girls. I want you to know that I pray for Rep and that each and every one of you would find a firm identity not in dance or one another or how you might be looked up to or looked at, no matter what is expected of you, but you’d find your identity in the Lord, in the promise that you are a woman full of grace and strength and purpose and balance and stride. I pray that these long rehearsal hours would help you to love your body. Spending time in it is wonderful its a blessing it’s something I miss and you get to have these hours. Love your physical self and love the bodies around you. I pray for Rep that you are able to find a way to love each other well, to build one another up, to seek out the peace and prosperity of the dance department and one another’s friendships.
I pray that you can fully experience the unique beauty that can be found in female friendships. Too many people go through life and do not know the true deep enriching light and love of sisterly love. And if not…if things this year are different or hard or not what you’d hoped for you would know that you are a beautiful artist, soul, friend. And that the Lord Is Good.
I hope we can chat soon. I miss you and hope your are flourishing!
All my love, Carolyn
I will leave you today on those words, on that note.
- “Coincidences” are more often than not God moments.
- Hope and enlightenment will come when and how they are supposed to. Be patient.
- Dance is a beautiful thing.
- JMU Dance is a beautiful thing.
- Angels exist and they come in the form of friends, both near and far.
- Lexie, you need to spend more time writing.
Thinking of you.